The Dreaded Letter

We got the letter today.  When it's good news it comes in two ways, a phone call or an email.  So when the letter came, a little part of me sank.  Disappointed, I opened and read the words no one applying for money wants to hear, we didn't choose you.  But honestly, I partly expected it.  I set myself up in the beginning to hope for a one out of four ratio.  And this is only the second one we have heard back from.  So, one out of two, not bad.  Pretty good.  Excellent in fact.

I refuse to give in to a pity party and be down about a "no" answer.  Because God's GOT this y'all.   We still have many grant applications out there, we have several fundraisers left to go....and we serve a very, very BIG God who promises to provide.

As some of you may know, we have faced some adversity along the way thus far and I am pretty sure there is more to come.  When it comes to adoption people seem to have strong opinions, and not always are they good or kind.  Sadly, some of those people have shared their thoughts with me.  I wish I could tell you that I have stayed tough and not let anything said get to me.  But in truth, it hurts.  Again I say, we serve a very, very BIG God.  And He knows my heart so well.  So at moments when I am tapped, when I begin to believe the negativity thrown my way....someone reaches out.  Every single time.  I will share of the words of encouragement and affirmation that have come our way, in the hopes you can also see the Lord's provision of exactly what we need at the right time.

"Deanna, I just want you to know I admire your family.  Moving forward to give these kids love and family is truly living your faith out loud.  Thank you for doing what most of us are not willing to do.  It is my pleasure to send a donation your way, to become part of the village for these kids."

"You were on my heart today and I have a verse for you, Ephesians 6:10, "Finally, Be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might."

"I am here for you.  I don't claim to be an adoption expert, but I know what it is to venture into the unknown.  So I am here for you.  Message, call, text....whatever you need.  So many times we try to "handle things" on our own.  Trust me, it is not a sign of weakness to reach out when you need to talk.  I am here for you, cheering you on through this testimony of faith."


So while for a moment I was disappointed regarding this grant, I still have the same peace I have had since the beginning....God's got this.  Every time that mud was being slung, defeat was upon us, weariness set in...we would receive a text, call, email, regular mail, or FB with the above encouragement.  At THE RIGHT time.  He will provide the money, He will provide the people we need for understanding how to parent these kids well, He will provide the pieces to fall into place.  Know why?  Because we are stepping out in the comfort of Philippians 4:19, "And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus."

I do not plan to share all the grant rejections via blog, cause really, I have no desire to focus on negative.  I will shout over every approval for sure!  On this one, I wanted to share so you can see and understand that our disappointment is only short lived, and we are rejoicing for the family or families that WERE chosen for this grant....there are only so many grants available and there are so many families in need....so we are filled with praise and peace in this.  Rejoice with us!